Slip of tongue

“Can you come up with another 50 word story?” she said…….”it spell challenge” she added.

Well, this is me, taking up the challenge…

I hope she likes it… (she knows herself, and she had better be the first to comment…)

****

“Marry me Jennifer” the words rolled off his tongue, as he held her hands across the table and stared into her smiling eyes.

In a flash, the smile vanished and her eyes narrowed into slits.

“I am Sade, you lying and cheating bastard!” she screamed and stormed out the restaurant.

***

so, what do you think?

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24 Comments Add yours

  1. zikaolofin says:

    Nice ‘developable’ story. You should think of following up. Seriously.

    1. topazo says:

      it is a 50 word story challenge…no follow up..
      wait a minute! you could develop the story and let’s see what you can make of this! Yes! I am passing the challenge to you….what do you say? yes? I heard you say yes, right? right?

      1. zikaolofin says:

        Hi Topazo, fiction isn’t my strong point but I’ll try. Hope what I finally come up with makes some sense at all. You’ll get the notification when I’m done.

        1. topazo says:

          been modest are we? I know you will write a piece that will blow our minds away…just like ‘phantom’
          you’ve got it in you ma’am…
          where is Yemie when I need her?!

          1. Yemie says:

            Am right here Doc and I know Zee will bring it just as she did that masterpiece poem ‘Phantom’! She’s definitely one to look out for! I already told her she’s gotten the hang of things and is presently running things, doing it like a boss! She’s just being coy! She’d deliver, you’ll see! Lol

            1. topazo says:

              Zee, you hear? see how yemie said it so much better, I hope you are gingered and fired up?
              I am waiting o

  2. Yemie says:

    This is very remarkable Doc, but then; no surprises there at all! Flash fictions have always been your strong point, your forte! You’ve more or less cast a niche for yourself in this genre! ‘Countdown’ is one of your strongest pieces as at yet! A masterpiece in its very own class! I applaud your efforts on this one too, and in my usual characteristic manner, I counted ’em words, again! *laughing*

    A pretty neat job you did here! Carry on soaring!

    1. topazo says:

      Yemieeeeeeeee!
      I am grateful…I am getting close to that Diabetes thingy o…lol
      I really appreciate your staunch support, gosh! I feel so overwhelmed…seriously…wherever did you come from?! I thank the gods for sending you my way…

      1. Yemie says:

        *tearing up* Aw! Thanks My Awesome Poet, that’s so ‘schweet’ of you! Am deeply humbled! And I thank my stars for bringing you my way too! You found me on MMS remember?! You rock pieces, all the time; every time! Diabetes sha?! Tufiakwa! *hugs* LOL

      2. zikaolofin says:

        We all thank God for bringing you our way Yemie. I think anybody who’s known you would say the same thing, “wherever did you come from?”

        1. Yemie says:

          *flushed* Oh delightfully, adorable Zee gurl, now am gonna break down for reals! You guys flatter me and I can just feel my ego rising up several notches higher! So help me Jah! Wherever did I come from?! Em…Venus?! LMAO

          Thanks bae, finding the lots of you amazing writers is MINE pleasure to savour! Can you see just how selfish I am?! You guys are a gift and I’ll cherish y’all for as long as I shall live! Thanks again! *grouphugs*

        2. topazo says:

          Exactly Zee, I am glad I am not the only one…

      3. zikaolofin says:

        Sorry. Looks like I’m slowly setting a record of barging into conversations wey no ‘consine’ me. No vex. I’ll mend my ways

        1. topazo says:

          Zee, you are family…never ever feel you are barging in!

            1. topazo says:

              you’re always welcome

          1. zikaolofin says:

            Meanwhile, I got some inspiration this evening over the mention of diabetes in your reply to Yemie. You’ll get it soon hopefully

            1. topazo says:

              I am waiting impatiently

  3. I think I will also take the challenge. When I am done. I will send the link.

    1. topazo says:

      Yay Dennis! I am waiting o…

  4. I like this! I’m getting an idea. *winks*

    1. topazo says:

      waiting for the birthing process….do quick, hurry!

  5. You soaked in tears on the recliner
    Counting and counting
    You pondered for hours
    But the totals remain the same and same

    And you remembered in explicit detail
    Her half-moon glasses you stared frankly
    Her lipstick free lips, yet luscious
    Her unadulterated hair, yet bold

    It must have been her.

    1. topazo says:

      thumbs up bro….

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