The whole concept of the twelve steps of the alcoholic anonymous revolves around a higher power. The surrendering of one’s will to a higher power, allowing that power to effect a change and acknowledging an inability to making those changes by one’s self. For different people, the ‘’higher power’’ could mean many things but generally it is often attributed to God.
At the core of this powerful message is the truth about humans. We are incapable of helping our selves most times and require help. In the case of addiction where there is a loss of control over the addictive behavior, and a general lack of will to resist doing it over and over again even in the face of harm, there is need to surrender that will over to a higher power, who supplies us with the strength to resist, one whom we fear and respect and would not want to disappoint.
That decision is based on trust. You believe that the ‘’higher power’’ is strong enough to supply the strength that you need to effect the changes that you want. You trust Him enough to open your heart to Him to search you and reveal areas that need changing and believe that He cares enough about you to be willing to help you whenever you need Him.
Coming to this decision is never easy. It is a journey of self-discovery. Most times we are scared of what we would find and even more scared of letting go and ready for the necessary changes. But once we have done it, we enter a new phase in our fight to get our lives back under control and free from the addictive behavior.
Here is what victor says:
‘’I woke up today and felt great. The past few days have been going fine. Since I made the decision to stop masturbating I have been feeling good with myself. I was finally doing the right thing. I leapt out of bed and started getting ready for work. As I stepped into the bathroom, I felt the familiar stirring in my groin. My breath caught in anticipation for the high of touching myself.
I was afraid. I knew I couldn’t stop myself from doing it that morning and all the joy in me dissipated and it was replaced by a heavy sadness. I didn’t want it but I wouldn’t be able to talk myself out of it. The ache was growing and I needed that release badly.
‘I don’t want to do this’ I thought frantically. I knew only a divine intervention could stop me. I tried to pray but the words would not come, and only the words ‘holy spirit’ came out. So I started chanting it as I undressed and ran the water. With each chant I felt the joy come back and my resolve getting stronger. After a few minutes, the ache had gone too. I had won! I was ecstatic. It worked!
That was when it hit me. I needed the higher power, needed Him to give me the strength to resist and make a change. I couldn’t do it on my own but with Him, I can do all things. I learnt another lesson that day, in dealing with my addiction, I needed a higher power, and mine is the Holy Spirit. ‘’